Never Forget You
by x-x-xCAROLANNEx-x-x
Summary: Ron has tried to deal with the one he loved most's death but after two years has he finally come to terms that she is dead...


NEVER FORGET YOU

**NEVER FORGET YOU**

A young man appeared with a slight _pop_ right on the road in the dead of night. He looked around for a few seconds and then set off down a familiar beaten path. The wind howled and sleet pounded the silent figure as he made his way down the street, casually checking behind him as he passed house after house. Finally he stopped at a charming two- story house that looked as though it was recently built. The young man pulled backed his hood to reveal long, shaggy red hair and a long pointed nose. Sighing, he stood in front of the house as if debating with himself.

_Damn, maybe I should have Flooed to see if he was even up,_ he thought as he pushed his hair out of his eyes. He put his hands in his pockets and then suddenly removed them, grasping a small handheld mirror. Silently berating himself for forgetting, he put the mirror up to his face and spoke into it.

"Harry," he said softly, hoping his friend was awake. The mirror shimmered for a second and then a face of his best friend/ brother-in-law appeared, widened with shock.

"Ron?"

"Yeah, mate, I'm here," he said, relieved his friend was indeed awake.

"What's wrong? When did you get back?"

"Nothing's wrong, I'm just freezing my bits off out here in front of your house," Ron said, exasperated. "I just got back a few hours ago. Now are you going to let me in?"

"Yeah, hold on."

Ron heard the unlocking of many enchantments before a thin young man with unruly black hair and emerald eyes appeared with a wide smile on his face.

"How'd you find us anyway? My address isn't exactly listed," Harry asked.

Ron rolled his eyes. "Well, I was finishing my report and my dad happened to walk by. We talked for a while, and he told me where to find you."

"I hope you Flooed your mum before you came. She went spare when you left."

"Yeah, I did," Ron said, shivering a little from the cold and memory of the conversation with his mum. "Bloody hell, I had forgotten how scary she can be."

Harry laughed. "Welcome home, Ron," he said with his arms held open.

Ron embraced his best friend before stepping into the warm house and looked around. The living room was wide and homey with a crackling fireplace. There were squishy armchairs and a large couch in the middle of the room. It was strangely familiar.

"Looks like the Gryffindor common room, Harry," Ron said with a laugh.

"That's what I was going for," Harry said with another laugh before locking the door again.

Ron looked at the locked door with amusement.

"What?" Harry said defensively, catching at what Ron was staring at. "Bloody reporters are so desperate for a story."

_Some things never change,_ Ron thought as he took off his travelling cloak and settled into an armchair next to the fire.

"Ron, what are you doing here?" Harry asked, getting back into his comfortable position on the sofa.

"Well, I need a place to crash for the night," Ron said.

"What about the Burrow?" Harry asked.

"After that tirade my mum just gave me, I'd rather wait till she calmed down."

Harry laughed and Ron gave him a dirty look.

"Well you did deserve it mate, what'd you think after leaving for so long and not contacting her. She was worried. We all were," Harry said reasonably.

Ron sighed, He knew that they all were worried about him but he didn't want it. He didn't want the looks of pity and sympathy, he just wanted to be left alone with his memories and the pain they brought him.

"So how's everyone been?" Ron asked, effectively changing the subject from more uncomfortable topics.

Harry sighed; he knew Ron was changing the subject. "Well, Bill and Fleur had their second child a few months back, his name's Jacque."

"What?" Ron asked incredulously.

Harry laughed. "As Fleur explained it, Bill got to name their first child so she got to name the next one."

"But, Jacque?" Ron said weakly.

Harry shrugged. "Anyway, Neville and Hannah got married and so did Angelina and Fred."

"Fred got married?!" Ron sputtered. "I'd never thought I'd see the day one of the twins actually settle down."

"Love works in mysterious ways," Harry said.

Ron snorted, but stopped the biting remark after the look Harry gave him.

"Oh, and Ginny's having twins," Harry said quickly.

Ron turned and looked at Harry in surprise and delight.

"Wow mate, congratulations."

Harry smiled excitedly. "Thanks."

Ron was truly happy for Harry. After the war he knew that all Harry had wanted was a peaceful, quiet life. That's why it didn't surprise him when Harry had turned down the Auror position and instead had taken the Defence Against the Dark Arts teaching post at Hogwarts. Harry loved teaching and he was good at it too. Ron guessed that instructing Dumbledore's Army had helped him see the joy in teaching. He had seen Harry swell with pride after D.A. meetings.

Ron shook his head to clear his thoughts. He didn't want to think of Hogwarts, he hadn't been back to the school since the final battle, the battle in which Ron had lost everything.

"Are you alright there, Ron?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, just thinking," Ron said.

Harry nodded and the two fell silent.

Ron watched the crackling fire without really looking at it. As happy as he was for his friends finding each other, he felt lost just the same. Everyone was picking up the pieces and moving on, living their lives to the fullest, and he was just barely holding on. Of course he felt isolated too, but he had done that purposely. After the war he'd become an Auror and worked non-stop. Death Eaters that had escaped after Voldemort fell still needed to be tracked and bought in, and seeing as he had first hand experience in the matter it made sense to join the hunt. It also gave Ron a way to escape the pity and sympathy from his family. The Weasleys had been hit by the war and the losses of his two elder brothers, Charlie and Percy, not to mention his other loss, had created a deep hole in Ron's heart. So he used his work to escape. After Auror training he went straight out on the field tracking Death Eaters, which had left him little time to really feel his losses. As a result Ron really hadn't had contact with his family the past two years and even when he did he didn't want to go into the subject of his feelings.

"So how was the mission?"

Ron looked up in surprise. Usually he never discussed his raids but this one was different and somehow he suspected Harry knew.

Ron sighed. "Mission was a success, we captured most of the remaining Death Eaters and those that didn't come were killed in the raid."

"And?" Harry questioned.

Ron squirmed under his friends' gaze. He knew he wasn't telling Harry the whole truth but the fact was he really didn't want to talk about it, because talking would bring up the memories he was trying to bury.

Suddenly Ron felt a presence inside his mind, as though a pair of eyes were softly trying to gaze in. Ron's face hardened and he blocked his mind while pushing the force out.

**"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?"** Ron yelled his eyes boring into Harry's.

"Shut up you idiot," Harry hissed, his eyes watering. "Do you want to wake Ginny?"

Ron clamped his mouth shut.

"I knew you weren't telling so I tried to get it out of you myself," Harry said. "But I've got to say your Occlumency skills have improved".

Ron rolled his eyes and turned back toward the fire.

"I killed Dolohov," Ron said quietly.

Harry looked at Ron pointedly.

"I didn't do it for revenge Harry," Ron said, reading the look Harry was giving him. "He didn't want to come quietly. Alecto and Amycus also were captured and so was Rudolphus Lestrange."

Harry nodded. "Are you okay?"

Ron shook his head. "No, it still hurts."

"I think you should go talk to her Ron."  
Ron looked up into Harry's eyes. They both knew who he was referring too. Ron held his gaze until he finally looked away and into the fire.

"I can't Harry," he said quietly.

Harry shook his head, frustrated. "Ron you haven't been to seen her since the funeral, you can't bottle this up."

"Ha, you're one to talk," Ron snapped.

Harry stepped back with a hurt look and turned and walked toward the kitchen.

"At least I learned," Harry said quietly. "Do you want some tea?"

Ron waved his hand dismissively and Harry got to work silently making tea.

Ron leaned back into his armchair, willing the memories back into his head. He knew he couldn't handle them, and that dull ache he felt in his heart, as Harry had mentioned her, grow into a hollow pang. He just wanted to forget anything about his past. It hurt too much and he didn't want to relive it. But he never really forgot, he just pushed it back. It was all tied to her and the fateful day when he lost everything and became this man.

"Everyday I'm reminded of her, Harry," Ron said quietly. "It's like a never- ending loop inside my head and I can't stop it. I miss her."

"I do too," Harry said as he handed Ron his tea.

"Do you, Harry?"

Harry looked up in surprise.

"Yeah, Ron, I do, and I'm reminded of her too. Do you forget where I work?" Harry said. "Every day that I walk those halls, I can still see her as if she were still here."

"But you seem fine with it Harry and I don't know if I can be like that. You've had Ginny to talk to and Mum has Dad, everyone has someone," Ron said sadly.

"Ron you have all of us too. But no matter what we're still family."

Ron shook his head. "I know, but it's different with that special someone and you know it Harry. You all understand me but no one understood me more than Herm- she did."

"We can never take that place Ron," Harry said quietly. "We can only help you move on and try to be happy."

"But I can't seem to move on and be happy, Harry," Ron said after taking a sip of tea. "I don't know if I can or if I really want to. I don't want to forget her."

"Look Ron, just go talk to her, it's helped me and Ginny too. We go up there and visit her quite often."

Ron looked up at Harry, and then set down his tea, got up and quickly walked to the door, fastening his cloak as he did so.

"Where are you going?" Harry asked.

"I'm just taking your advice," Ron said quietly. "Thanks for the talk mate, I'll be back later."

"Ron."

"Yeah, mate?"

"It's her birthday."

"I know, and now I'm going to give her what she wanted for me."

Harry nodded and let Ron out. He watched as Ron made his way up the path and then turned on the spot, disappearing into the night

Harry shut the door and walked up to his room where his very pregnant redheaded wife lay up waiting.

"Did you talk to him?" she asked as he lay down next to her.

"Yep, told him exactly what you told me to tell him, Ginny."

"Well he needed to hear it and now we can have our old Ron back," she said quietly as she ran her fingers absently through his hair.

Harry looked up at her and kissed her softly. "You're brilliant."

She smiled. "I know."

The crescent moon shone down brilliantly and lit the way, as Ron walked out of the forest clearing. His heart was going a mile a minute and his thoughts were spinning, _how did I let Harry talk me into this,_ he thought as he walked towards the outcropping of the cliff. He stopped as the granite head monument on the edge of the cliff came into view. He clutched his chest as he willed the tears to recede from his eyes and fought to control his breathing as his heart leapt into his throat. _No, I can't do this,_ he thought as he turned toward the clearing again. _No, I have to do this. I can't let it scare me._

Summoning all his Gryffindor courage, he straightened up and walked resolutely towards the cliff. Ron stopped in front of the monument and grave lying under it reading the inscription:

_Hermione Jane Granger  
Loving friend, beloved daughter  
You were an inspiration to us all, may we never forget your sacrifice._

Ron sat down next to the grave, facing the ocean with the moon sparkling high above him. He sat for a long time composing his thoughts. He took out his wand and conjured a bouquet of roses and then transfigured a rock into a stuffed otter. He stood up and faced the grave once more.

"Happy Birthday, Hermione," he said quietly, laying the gifts at monument.

He stood there silently as he ran his hand through his hair. He took a deep breath and sighed as he let the tears fall down his cheeks. Ron bowed his head, sobbing quietly, the tears falling fast down his cheeks and his shoulders shuddering. He finally let go the barriers of in his mind and let the memories come, filling up his heart with the pain of loss:

_A young woman, in beautiful midnight blue dress robes, with her hair tied elegantly into a bun, was swaying softly in the arms of a red-headed young man to the music. When they looked up at each other, their eyes locking, a passionate kiss on the dance floor ensued in front of family and friend, their love plain for all to see._

_Ron sitting next to Hermione in the garden before they left on the Horcrux hunt, telling her he loved her, watching as tears of joy sped down her cheeks, feeling the delight of his sentiments returned._

_Watching as she fell to the green light, a look of surprise and shock on her face and the despair, the anger, the overwhelming loss his heart felt. Closing her eyes with a shaking hand as his harsh sobs cut his soul and filled his heart with sadness._

He still didn't know what to say, even as those memories of her surfaced to his mind bringing with them unbridled joy and never-ending sadness. As those memories subsided and the awkward silence hung in the night, Ron did what he did best: he babbled.

"It's been two years since I've been here, and a lot has happened. I've become an Auror. I know, surprise huh. Didn't even need N.E.W.T.S. to do it, but I've never studied so much in my life. You'd have been proud." He chuckled lightly as visions of a bushy haired first year girl handing him a revision schedule swept through his head. "Anyway, that's why I haven't been here as much. I've been hunting Death Eaters" He didn't know why he was telling her all this. But it felt good talking to her like this, as if she was still here. "It's kind of like the old days, with the three of us solving mysteries, fighting Death Eaters and Dark creatures. Harry even helps out sometimes, gives me advice and stuff. He's not supposed to, but you know Harry, he can't help acting the hero." He could feel his throat tightened at those memories, memories of three friends standing up anything that threatened their loved ones. He swallowed the lump. "Harry and Ginny got married last year. I wish you could have been there, it was beautiful." He fell silent now. The lump had grown and he couldn't continue. His heart had constricted as he tried to control his emotions. "W- We all miss you."

"I miss you."

He had said it. The thing he'd been fighting against ever since he had come here had burst out. He finally admitted the one fact he'd been denying for two years.

"I miss everything about you."

His heart tightened even more and he pressed his hand against his chest.

"That could have been us, Hermione. Every time I think about that day with Ginny and Harry, I think it could have been us. It should have been us. Why did you have to d-die? Why did you leave m-me all alone?"

The tears were still pouring down his cheeks. He fell to his knees in front of the grave, anger and anguish was written all over his face.

**"WHY DID YOU DIE?"** he raged, turning his face to the silent night.

He bowed his head, tears dripping off his long nose. His anger was gone as quickly as it came leaving him with a sadness that tore his heart.

"It's not fair," he said quietly. "It's not fair that you died when you- we had so much to live for. Do you remember how we talked about getting out of England, going travelling, seeing the sights, and just relaxing. You wanted to get married in the summer and have a house right next to Harry and Ginny so we could all be together. You wanted to be a teacher and you'd have made a damn good one. There was so much you wanted- we wanted and now it's all gone. You're gone."  
"We were so happy and now I'm empty and I don't know what to do without you."

He paused to wipe his face with the sleeve of his cloak and felt a small piece of paper. He instinctively pulled it out and gazed at the photo. It was a photo of the four of them at Bill's wedding. Harry had his arm around Ginny and was laughing at some joke she had told him and Hermione was sitting on the grass beside him, their hands were intertwined and a look of complete contentment on her face. It was a perfect day of peace and happiness and it was reflected in that one frame of time.

"You were so beautiful," he said gazing at her picture. "You were perfect in every way and I loved you more than life itself." He gazed at the picture almost willing her to jump to life. "You're all I ever think about. You and the life we should have had. I don't know how to live without you or how to move on. You were all I ever wanted for so long and we never got a chance to just be us. How do I do it? How do I live without you?"

He sighed and got to his feet once more and moved to the side of the monument to his lost love. The sea was pounding against the rock cliff below as the moon was reflected off the furious ocean.

"Would you be proud of me right now? How I've been living now? Is this how you would want me to live like this? I work all the time and I have no idea what's going on with my best friend or my family? I haven't been home in two years! I'm out of touch with everything!"

He fell silent, running his fingers across the picture of her. He thought about what she would say and how she would react to his forced isolation.

"I've been running away," he said. "I've been running away from you, from my memories, from everything that reminded me of you. I didn't want to face the fact that you were gone. I'm scared of moving on, of living without you and love. I'm sacred of forgetting you. I don't want to say goodbye."

He turned his back to the ocean and moved to face the grave once more. He wanted to do this properly, as hard as it was going to be. He closed his eyes and pictured her standing there before him, her bushy hair waving in the wind, a warm smile on her lips and those hazel eyes that he could always get lost staring in.

"G- Goodbye, Hermione," he choked out. "I- I love you. I always will love you, but I have to let go. That's what you would want me to do and I would want you to do the same. I'll never forget the time we had even if it was too short. I'll never forget you or the love we shared. It was special just like you were. Rest easy now and know that you will be forever with me."

He opened his eyes just as the wind kicked up around him. It swirled around and for a fleeting second Ron heard a familiar voice.

_"I'll always love you, forever. I'm so proud of you."_

Ron's eyes widened and the wind died into a gentle breeze. He felt the familiar touch of her against his cheek and then it was gone.

Ron smiled and turned away from grave. Walking away from the grave, he felt the picture in his hand grow warm. He took a closer look at the picture, frowning slightly, and slowly turned it over. His smiled widened even further as he gazed at the words written in that familiar, neat handwriting:

_Never Forget_

"I'll never forget," said Ron, as he put the picture back in his pocket. He took one last look at the night sky and the stars twinkling at him and Apparated back to his life.


End file.
